Best Of: 2017 NFL Regular Season

And with that, the 2017 NFL regular season, the one we all waited so painstakingly for six months between the Falcons shitting the bed and the season opener. From Kareem ‘the Dream’ Hunt’s absurd 246-yard, three-touchdown introduction to the NFL in the season opener to Andy Dalton’s ascension into Buffalo sports immortality amid a final day that featured not one, not two, but three kicks returned to the house, the regular season came to a close. We’re now in a new season—the postseason—and a new year, so let’s take a look at a few of the top stories from this season.

Chris Long is a Beauty — In an utterly unprecedented and selfless move, Eagles defensive end Chris Long decided to donate his first six game checks to support educational equality in Charlottesville after the riots. Awesome, right? He followed that up by donating his next 10 game checks (that’s all 16, in case you weren’t counting) to several other organizations around the US with similar equal opportunity education mandates. So this guy essentially dedicated his whole season, all five sacks and four forced fumbles, to an issue he’s passionate about. If donating your entire salary (which was about $1 million) to educational equality doesn’t make you an absolute fuckin’ beauty then I don’t know what does. I hope he isn’t the last pro athlete to donate more than a few game checks to causes like these.

Antonio Brown… the GOAT? — Not yet, and maybe not ever, but there’s no debating Antonio Brown is having an unprecedented run. Since becoming a full-time starter in 2013, Brown has caught 100 passes every season. Over the past four years, Brown has averaged 118 receptions, 1,587 yards and 11 touchdowns a year, a four-year stretch unmatched by any receiver in history. Not Jerry Rice, not Randy Moss, not Terrell Owens. And this all considering the fact he didn’t even play in the Steelers’s final three games of the season. Since 2013, Brown leads the NFL in receptions (582), targets (858), yards (7848) and touchdowns (52). If that’s not the pinnacle of football dominance I don’t know what is. Because of Brown’s late ascendance to stardom (he didn’t join the starting lineup until his age 25 season) it’s doubtful he ever touches Rice’s all-time records. But when you look at Brown’s numbers in his prime, stack em up against his contemporaries and the best receivers in history, I think it’s safe to say we’re in the presence of the most dominant receiver ever. Oh yeah, and he still won the receiving crown this season despite not playing in his final three games.

Andy Dalton: The Hero Buffalo Deserved — I think the best story in football, maybe even in sports, this year is the Andy Dalton-Bills love-fest that’s been going on for the past week. When Bengals QB Andy Dalton hit Tyler Boyd for a 49-yard touchdown on 4th and 12 with 44 seconds left, it not only won the Bengals the game 31-27 and sent the hated Ravens home without a playoff spot, it pushed the Buffalo Bills (who’d won 22-16 over the Dolphins earlier that day) into the playoffs for the first time since January 8th, 2000. It was the longest active playoff drought in North American sports. The last time the Bills had made the playoffs Britney Spears was still a promising young pop artist, Bills QB Nate Peterman was 5, Clay Matthews’ uncle was still in the NFL, Mr. Bill was still in the White House, and Star Wars Episode I: the Phantom fucking Menace was still in theatres. These guys haven’t been to the show since Darth Maul sliced up Liam Neeson. A lot has happened since then, but Liam Neeson sure as hell never allowed himself to be killed onscreen again.

Perhaps the best part of the end of the Bills’ drought is their fans’ reaction. The Bills fans have been the most endearingly savage fanbase in football and perhaps in North American sports for some time now. I can’t lie, #BillsMafia has become a weekly source of entertainment for me for some time now. Every week there’s a new drunken escapade and of course the week after they make the postseason for the first time in a generation was no different. After the fans that went to see their Bills at Hard Rock Stadium in Miami watched the end of the Bengals game on the TVs in the stadium, they began celebrating like no other fans could.

You know there had to be a band of Bills fans that went to Ralph Wilson Stadium to connect on another of their patented (and drunken) jumping-on-and-sometimes-crushing-a-table escapades. They also flooded Dalton’s foundation with donations—over $315,000 from over 14,000 donors so far, to which Dalton responded by buying four billboards in the Buffalo area to thank #BillsMafia—while other fans have been openly considering inducting the good ol’ Red Rifle into the Bills Ring of Honour. You gotta love these motherfuckers right? Not to mention that with their playoff opponent’s QB Blake Bortles looking a lot more like Blake Bortles lately (five picks in his last two games) the Bills could also be in for their first playoff win since 1995, the year yours truly touched down. It’ll be mighty difficult without a healthy Shady McCoy and against a very, very good Jaguars defence, but I think Buffalo can count on at least one defensive touchdown courtesy of Blakey. (Prediction: Bills 17 Jags 16).

To. The. House. — It’s been a while since the kickoff was returned more often than not. What with the increased boot strength of kickoff-ers and the 25-yard line start awarded for touchbacks, it does make sense. But in Week 17 the kick return was back with a vengeance: we got treated to three fucking kickoffs returned to the house. I don’t know about you but I really can’t remember the last time we had three in one week. Maybe back in the heydays of the Human Joystick and Devin Hester. Ahh, those were the days. There was Tyler Lockett‘s 99-yarder (above), which was exciting and all but unfortunately didn’t contribute to a Seahawks playoff berth. Wah.

There was rookie third-rounder Alvin Kamara‘s 106-yarder, which came in a Saints loss to the Bucs (really Drew?) that forced New Orleans to play on Wild Card Weekend against a tough Panthers team (I still think Drew Brees will lead them to victory though. Prediction: Saints 31 Panthers 27). Kamara has been ridiculously good this season, and the longest play in the NFL this season was just icing on the cake, baby. This guy was somehow a third round pick and put up 1,554 yards from scrimmage with 13 goddamn touchdowns. I strongly suggest you follow that link and watch the wild shit this man did in 2017. This guy was a mufuckin’ monster this season, and don’t expect the Panthers to stop him in the Wild Card matchup either. Just watch the kickoff return again, this dude was about to take a knee in the end zone before he somehow spotted some gap and just glided right into it and down the sideline. Big shout out to that linesman for keeping up with the kid too. That boy fast.

Kamara is almost sure to win the Offensive Rookie of the Year award for his performance this season, but perhaps his best competition also returned a kickoff for a touchdown in Week 17—and he actually broke a few tackles in doing so. Pittsburgh rookie wideout Juju Smith-Schuster is the youngest player in the league (he was born in 1996, so he was just three last time the Bills made the playoffs, they grow up so fast don’t they?) but he’s already one of the most notable players thanks to his penchant for big plays (two 90+-yard plays this season), his propensity for big hits (hello Vontaze Burfict, how ya feelin’ buddy) and his proclivity for hilarious and creative touchdown celebrations. He had the longest play from scrimmage this season (a 97-yard touchdown against the Lions) and probably five of the top ten touchdown celebrations to boot. On the season the kid caught 58 balls for 917 yards and seven touchdowns, including six grabs of 40+ yards, good for fourth in the entire league. Not quite Kamara numbers, but pretty fucking impressive for a guy that’s actually younger than me. Yikes.


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  17. The fresh new Zune browser is remarkably superior, nevertheless not as Excellent as the iPod’s. It operates effectively, yet is just not as prompt as Safari, and consists of a clunkier interface. If you occasionally method on employing the website browser that is not an issue, yet if you are planning in direction of study the web alot from your PMP then the iPod’s greater screen and far better browser may possibly be essential.

  18. This is becoming a bit additional subjective, still I substantially like the Zune Industry. The interface is vibrant, contains additional aptitude, and some cool functions like ‘Mixview’ that let your self all of a sudden look at very similar albums, audio, or other people equivalent towards what you might be listening towards. Clicking upon one of people will center upon that merchandise, and one more fixed of “neighbors” will arrive into feeling, letting by yourself to navigate in excess of studying via equivalent artists, music, or people. Chatting of customers, the Zune “Social” is in addition superior exciting, enabling yourself come across other folks with shared choices and getting close friends with them. You then can listen towards a playlist designed based mostly upon an amalgamation of what all your pals are listening to, which is far too fascinating. Those apprehensive with privacy will be relieved towards realize oneself can avert the general public in opposition to seeing your personal listening patterns if by yourself so choose.

  19. This is having a little bit even more subjective, yet I much want the Zune Sector. The interface is colourful, consists of even further flair, and some amazing characteristics together with ‘Mixview’ that allow on your own out of the blue look at comparable albums, audio, or other users very similar to what you might be listening toward. Clicking on 1 of people will heart upon that solution, and an additional established of “neighbors” will appear into watch, making it possible for you to navigate in the vicinity of looking into by very similar artists, new music, or users. Talking of end users, the Zune “Social” is as well perfect exciting, permitting you find others with shared preferences and turning out to be pals with them. On your own then can listen to a playlist made based mostly upon an amalgamation of what all your mates are listening towards, which is too fascinating. People apprehensive with privacy will be relieved towards recognize oneself can avert the community in opposition to observing your person listening behavior if oneself hence make a decision.

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  21. Zune and iPod: Maximum folks examine the Zune in direction of the Touch, still right after watching how skinny and incredibly minimal and light it is, I try out it towards be a quite unique hybrid that brings together qualities of possibly the Contact and the Nano. It can be incredibly vibrant and attractive OLED display is a bit scaled-down than the touch screen, still the participant alone feels reasonably a bit smaller sized and lighter. It weighs regarding 2/3 as a lot, and is substantially lesser in just width and peak, even though being just a hair thicker.

  22. Apple presently incorporates Rhapsody as an application, which is a superb start off, but it is at this time hampered through the inability to shop locally on your iPod, and has a dismal 64kbps little bit value. If this modifications, then it will considerably negate this usefulness for the Zune, however the 10 audio per thirty day period will still be a substantial additionally inside of Zune Pass’ desire.

  23. This is becoming a little bit added subjective, but I a great deal like the Zune Market place. The interface is colorful, is made up of extra aptitude, and some awesome options like ‘Mixview’ that make it possible for yourself abruptly view very similar albums, new music, or other buyers comparable towards what you might be listening toward. Clicking on just one of those will centre upon that product, and a further fixed of “neighbors” will appear into perspective, allowing for by yourself towards navigate more than researching by means of equivalent artists, songs, or buyers. Speaking of users, the Zune “Social” is far too Terrific enjoyment, allowing by yourself identify other folks with shared tastes and turning into friends with them. Your self then can hear toward a playlist manufactured based upon an amalgamation of what all your buddies are listening in direction of, which is moreover fascinating. These fearful with privateness will be relieved in the direction of understand on your own can protect against the public from observing your individual listening behaviors if by yourself so pick.

  24. Apple at this time is made up of Rhapsody as an app, which is a very good begin, yet it is presently hampered by means of the incapacity toward retail store domestically upon your iPod, and consists of a dismal 64kbps little bit price. If this variations, then it will relatively negate this ease for the Zune, yet the Ten music per thirty day period will however be a large in addition within just Zune Pass’ prefer.

  25. Zune and iPod: Greatest people examine the Zune to the Contact, but when looking at how thin and astonishingly minimal and light it is, I check out it in direction of be a in its place unique hybrid that brings together features of the two the Touch and the Nano. It is really Pretty colorful and beautiful OLED display is slightly smaller sized than the contact screen, however the participant alone feels fairly a little bit smaller and lighter. It weighs around 2/3 as much, and is noticeably smaller sized in width and height, although being only a hair thicker.

  26. Fingers down, Apple’s application store wins by a mile. It really is a huge conclusion of all sorts of applications vs a alternatively unsatisfied range of a handful for Zune. Microsoft has programs, especially in just the realm of games, but I am not positive I’d need to guess upon the long term if this characteristic is major to oneself. The iPod is a substantially improved determination inside of that circumstance.

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  28. The Zune concentrates on currently being a Moveable Media Player. Not a world-wide-web browser. Not a game machine. Possibly within the potential it’ll do even superior inside those areas, still for already it’s a Great way towards prepare and pay attention in direction of your new music and flicks, and is without peer within that respect. The iPod’s strengths are its world-wide-web visiting and programs. If all those strong even more persuasive, potentially it is your suitable preference.

  29. I will tools this review towards Two versions of people in america: existing Zune householders who are taking into consideration an update, and people in america attempting in the direction of determine among a Zune and an iPod. (There are other players great importance taking into consideration out there, which include the Sony Walkman X, still I expect this offers your self plenty of facts in the direction of generate an conscious selection of the Zune vs players other than the iPod line as very well.)

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  31. The Zune concentrates upon being a Moveable Media Player. Not a net browser. Not a activity machine. Probably inside of the future it’s going to do even far better inside people areas, nonetheless for at the moment it can be a exceptional path in direction of organize and hear towards your tunes and films, and is without peer in that respect. The iPod’s advantages are its website checking out and applications. If these strong further compelling, quite possibly it is your suitable final decision.

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  40. Apple previously contains Rhapsody as an application, which is a fantastic get started, however it is now hampered via the incapacity in the direction of retail store domestically upon your iPod, and includes a dismal 64kbps bit value. If this modifications, then it will to some degree negate this benefit for the Zune, nonetheless the 10 songs for each thirty day period will however be a substantial plus within Zune Pass’ want.

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